Catholic gays who stick to Church teaching may have more to suffer than the rest of us Part One

Stuart Reid has started a very interesting debate (click here to join in) on whether some homosexuals are dealt a tougher hand of cards than the rest of us. Stuart Reid received a letter from an anonymous Catholic homosexual where the man politely rebuked Stuart Reid. Reid had previously written that some homosexuals form ‘a rich and privileged minority.’ Here I reproduce most of the letter sent to Reid:

“… I can’t for the life of me understand why you think that some homosexuals are ‘a rich and privileged minority’. Often the opposite is true. I, for example, am not rich. I live a rather empty and lonely life, never fully able to be who I am, for, yes, I encounter prejudice often (especially at church). I will never have the privilege of fathering children, or of having a loving relationship…
“Many ‘gays’ such as myself go to church and try to lead a good (and chaste) life. I try to live by the precepts of the Church I love.
“It is quite hurtful when our priests talk of ‘the evil of homosexuality’ in the same breath as abortion, prostitution, etc, as if there are no ‘gays’ in the congregation at all! As I am sure you are aware, finding oneself homosexual is not a choice, whereas these other situations are avoidable…
“Some time ago, one of your articles made mention of an outrageously dressed individual in a post office queue. You assumed he was ‘gay’. But in my experience, gay men usually dress quite conservatively, and often with a more pronounced masculinity than is usual. I am sure, for instance, you may have passed me at the 9am Mass [traditional Latin] at the Oratory, as I’m there every week, but I suspect that I blend in with the other traditional Catholics in my sombre jacket and tie…

“But to finish, please take care what you say – there are more people of ‘homosexual orientation’ in the Church than I think you realise. Meanwhile enjoy your privilege of children and grandchildren, and the privilege of acceptance by all.”
Stuart Reid finishes with this comment: “self-denying homosexuals – homosexuals who try to live by the Church’s teaching – often have a lot more to mourn and weep about than the rest of us.”

PS – I think the anonymous man who wrote to Stuart Reid has made some London Oratory excellent points.  And I applaud his bravery in writing so sincere a letter. This man did not choose his orientation, but chooses to live by Church teaching whereby he does not engage in homosexual acts. And there is something to be learned here – we may not condemn an individual on the basis of his/her sexuality. 

PPS - I will be careful in selecting which comments to publish.