"HOLY GOD SAYS I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH TO GO YET"

After He appeared to her, Nellie described His fingers as "tucked up"

One autumnal morning, Sister Immaculata and Miss Hall visited Little Nellie in the infirmary. These women were always called, "my modders" by Nellie. They were surprised to see Nellie was still alive, because she had been so deathly sick during the night. Miss Hall inquired after her patient, "Well, how are you today, darling? I thought that you would have been with Holy God by this time." The last statement of Miss Hall's betrayed that she thought Nellie was on death's door. Little Nellie was undaunted by the prospect of her death, and by way of answer she exclaimed knowingly, "Oh, no! Holy God says I am not good enough to go yet." Miss Hall courted more detail from Nellie, "What do you know about Holy God?" To which Nellie gave the audacious answer, "Him did come and stand dere, and Him did say dat."

Miss Hall and Sister Immaculata exchanged looks of awe. Sister Immaculata asked of Nellie, "Where was He, Nellie?" Nellie pointed to a specific spot by her cot, and pronounced, "Dere." 

It transpired that Our Lord told many things to Little Nellie that first time He appeared to her. For one thing He told her she was not good enough to die yet. But He also gave her religious instruction that very much edifies us as to the truth of the Catholic Faith. Our Lord Jesus also told her that He was alive in the Eucharist and that when the Eucharist was exposed, He was the Host in the monstrance.

At the time Our Lord first appeared to Little Nellie by her cot so He could teach her, Nellie had never seen the Eucharist exposed, but the next time there was Eucharistic adoration in the chapel, Miss Hall carried Nellie to the chapel and for the first time Little Nellie saw the Host, and she exclaimed, "Modder, there He is, there is Holy God now." Nellie was in great ecstasy and her face glowed.

The chapel where Nellie worshiped   

That first time before the Sacred Host, Little Nellie's face was transfigured as though a great beacon of light shone from behind her face, and when Nellie left the chapel she met the Reverend Mother who was profoundly moved by the sight of the little one, and she perceived an air of sanctity about Nellie. The Reverend Mother was cognizant of how sick Nellie had been, and she stooped down and asked, "Well, how is baby today?" Little Nellie did not answer with words, but laid her face on Reverend Mother's shoulder and wept. Later the nun would reminisce that at that moment, "It was made known to me interiorly that God had some special designs on the child and that I, the then Superior was expected to cooperate with Him in accomplishing them."

Ever after that day without anyone telling her or without any sign to guide her (Nellie could not read), Nellie always knew when there was Eucharistic adoration in the chapel. Nellie had felt Our Lord's presence immediately beside her cot, and she knew when His presence was exposed. When the Host was in the monstrance for Eucharistic adoration, Little Nellie would stare at Miss Hall or Sister Immaculata and with begging eyes she would beseech, "Take me down to the chapel. I know dat Holy God is not in de lock-up today." Nellie never did learn that it was more correct to say, "tabernacle" than "lock-up", for all her days she just presumed Holy God was a prisoner for our sake.

As for the Reverend Mother, she wanted to ask the bishop to come and give Nellie confirmation as soon as possible. She was very mindful of Nellie's approaching demise, the doctor had all but signed Nellie's death certificate and Nellie was weaker and sicker with every passing moment. But the bishop had been ill, and reverend mother didn't want to impose upon His Lordship, even though he had told her to tell him to come and confirm any child in danger of sudden death. She sent a letter to Bishop O'Callaghan and introduced Nellie in writing, but she did not mention Nellie's poor health or proffer that Nellie be confirmed swiftly. The bishop took no notice of this introduction, he thought it just a routine mention. Yet low and behold the next morning he was offering Holy Mass he felt inspired to confirm Nellie, and so straightaway after breakfast he called the Reverend Mother and announced that he was coming that very day at noon to give the Sacrament of Confirmation to Nellie Organ.

The sisters had merely a tiny bundle of hours to prepare for the arrival of Bishop O'Callaghan and they prepared a beautiful white dress and veil for Nellie. Sister Immaculata was delegated the role of catechizing Nellie, and so she swept up to the infirmary and prepared to drill Nellie on the Catholic doctrine essential to know before one is confirmed. To her amazement, however, Immaculata found that Nellie knew all the points of instruction already: Our Lord had taught her everything she needed to know when he appeared to her by her cot.