LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MEET MAL!

 Mal is the best Border Collie on the internet. And I have a guilty pleasure, or fleecy one, watching the shorts her owner Mike puts on You-Tube. Canine comedy central. 

A tip for calming such a one as her, give them an ear massage. The ears of a Border Collie are like satellite dishes; they just pick up more signals. 

With hands at their tenderest, comb the back forward and then with an index finger stroke the tips. Canine diazepam.